Fantasy Football Rumors, Insults, Threats & Corruption

Before I go into some of the chaos that ensued today, please allow me to present the facts (100% Truth).
- Fantasy Football League Dues were $55.
- I only gave the commissioner $45 as he already owed me $10 for pizza hut.
- I paid my league dues one day late.

Afternoon
I started getting strange looks shortly after lunch time, which gave me the indication that something was up. I then received a call from a customer care representative, telling me that I did not pay my league dues. While I was still on the phone, the league commissioner passed by and gave me an evil smile. I instantly knew at that point he was spreading rumors about me.

I asked the customer care rep if the commissioner had just been in her office. She denied it. The call ended with the following statement:

Customer Care Representative: "We will call your mom, if you don't pay your league dues."

Before hanging up, I heard another customer care member tell her my mom's actual name...


Later that Afternoon
About an hour later I was cced on an e-mail chain between the same CC Rep from earlier & HR. There was no subject, but shockingly the (false) topic of me not paying my league dues came up again...

CC Rep: "He did not pay his dues, he should be kicked out and his points divided among every one."

HR: "Thank you very much for your insightful feedback and I 100% agree with your recommendation. I have cc copied in our beloved Commissioner so he can take action to rid the league of this thing." (Apparently I'm a thing)

CC Rep: "Thank you I appreciate your continued support."

HR: "You are most welcome and I am always happy to help; we just had a discussion with our Commish, a vote may be coming soon."

Still in the Late Afternoon...

Immediately following this back and forth, I overheard a group of the league members talking about me and my lack of league dues payment (Even though I paid weeks ago).

Colleague #1: "Let's see so there are twelve people in the league, so the remaining eleven can come and throat punch him at the same time." 

Trying to ignore their comments, I headed to the bathroom. Looking over at one of the other league managers, I was greeted with the following:

Colleague #2: "You better pay up, or you're going to PAY up!"

I didn't know threatening other colleagues was allowed in the workplace, but apparently when HR is against you, it is. 

End of Day (League Dues Violation)

I logged on to the fantasy football homepage only to find that the league commissioner had made a new posting.

I can't wait to see what tomorrow will hold. I'm sure another fun filled day will be waiting for me.

Inter-department Lunch

A few weeks back I received an e-mail inviting me to an inter-department lunch. Normally I would eagerly accept a free lunch invitation. However, I was hesitant about this one for a few reasons.

#1. I rarely work with this department (Most would say it's because I never do any work).
#2. It was scheduled on (Wendy's) Wednesday (One of my favorite days of the week).
#3. I was personally invited by the department head (Who happens to be one of my sworn enemies).
#4. It is public knowledge that one member of this department (Helga) is in love with me (she harasses me every day).

After a couple days of internal debate I decided that despite the above, I would be getting free Italian food. So, how bad could it be?

Getting to the Restaurant
Well it started off pretty good. On the car ride there, me and two of my colleagues listened to some BSB, NSYNC, Destiny's Child & SClub 7. I was hoping for some Celine Dion as well, but I didn't want to get too greedy.

However, this happiness was short lived. We were about five minutes away from the restaurant, when my colleague (known for her extreme road rage & truck driver language) cut off some lady and almost killed us. I was scared for my life. My colleague only seemed concerned with cursing out the other driver. She was adamant that it was the other lady's fault. I strongly disagree.

Unfortunate Seating Arrangements
Anyway, we ended up making it to the restaurant in one piece. I wanted to sit at the opposite end of the table from Helga, but my sworn enemy arranged the seating of his team so I was forced to sit next to her. Everyone felt bad for me including the neighboring restaurant guests, the waitresses and even the restaurant owner. I asked if I could sit at a separate table by myself, but unfortunately they couldn't accommodate my request.

I begrudgingly sat down and took one of the small paper menus. Instead of interacting with my other colleagues (which would likely help bridge the gap between our departments) I decided it would be a good idea to ignore them all and make a paper airplane out of the menu. The colleagues sitting next to me were talking about Maroon & Burgundy being Fall colors or something...

Though I didn't say it out loud, I thought of a very specific quote that one of my other colleagues often says. (Perfect for this situation.)

"What do I care?"

Paper Airplane
Blocking out the conversation, I was able to focus on folding the Menu up to make my plane. When I was finished I asked the nicest colleague there to rate my airplane on a scale of one to ten (ten being best). I eagerly awaited her response as she is a very positive & complimentary person.

Nice Colleague: "That is the worst airplane I have ever seen."
Me: (I had no comment as her rating dropped my self-esteem so low, it rendered me speechless.)

I remained saddened until the waitress brought over some free appetizers and plates.

Soda Incident
I proactively picked up the plates and started passing them out to my colleagues. In doing so, I accidentally knocked over my glass of soda. The soda spilled all over the table, but luckily not one drop spilled on me!

I took a handful of napkins and started cleaning up the table only to find out that my colleague was not so lucky. I turned to my right to find that soda got all over Helga's shirt and even her hair!

She immediately started complaining and yelling at me. Ignoring her cries, I just continued cleaning the table and we all just laughed and laughed and laughed. What a fun lunch!

Honorary Member
Next, as the honorary member of the lunch I was asked to talk about one thing that no one knew about me. I mentioned that Helga stalks me so she already knows everything about my life.  

Some Background Info: I came out of a Pizza Hut one night and Helga was standing there in the parking lot taking pictures of me.

Anyway, for the other department members (who don't stalk me) I spoke about my amazing garden and my potential future life as a farmer.

The D
After the conversation, one of my co-workers mentioned to the group that I had also started a blog.

Colleague #1: "It's called Simply Survive on Blog spot."
Colleague #2: "Simply Survived dot blogspot dot com? "

Me: "No, just Simply Survive dot blogspot dot com. I wanted the D, but someone else had it."

Colleagues with sick minds immediately burst out in laughter.

After the inappropriate behavior, our food came. I ate my Chicken Parmesan sandwich and fries and I drank the remaining soda I had left. It was pretty good... maybe 7 out of 10.

Conclusion
In closing, I made sure to thank the department for inviting me to their team lunch. After my great performance during lunch, I asked the team what percentage chance I had of getting a job in their department.

Department Manager: "20%"
Me: "Not bad!" (It is much lower when I ask accounting for a job.)

It was then time to drive back to work. Unfortunately for me, Helga was the one driving me back and apparently she was still upset about the whole soda incident.

Department Manager (To his subordinate Helga): "Drive CAREFULLY"
Helga: "I'm gonna drive off-road and kill us all!"
 

Me: "Oh, god"

There were some ups and downs throughout this lunch, but all in all it was a great experience! I am happy to have lived to tell this story. Hopefully, I will be invited back next time.

Current Garden Status (One Month Update)

 So it's been about a month since I started growing my crops. The picture to the left was taken about 3 weeks ago. The picture to the right was just taken this morning. Scarecrow Steve has been doing an excellent job so far. Since his first appearance on September 4th, not one of my plants has been eaten.  However, my mom still decided to buy me a second scarecrow because apparently Steve is not a "real" scarecrow. I strongly disagree.

Crop Status
Everything I started growing on August 22nd is still doing very well. My sunflowers, cucumbers, tomato seedlings, corn, muskmelon, carrots, red pepper plant, string beans, spinach and peas are all growing pretty quickly. The only thing that never started growing was the cilantro, but that's okay.

Today I transplanted my sunflowers into a larger pot. I also transplanted my tomato seedlings & muskmelon in the same planter my corn is currently in. I'm not sure if there are going to be any negative side effects to this, but we'll see!

My carrots have been growing rapidly too. I pretty much just threw a bunch of seats in the pot and hoped for the best. I think you're supposed to thin out the seedlings so the carrots will have room to grow, but I'll just leave them for now.

Finally, I'm happy to announce that one of my cucumber plants started budding and now I have six cucumbers already growing! One of my colleagues told me that it takes about two weeks for a cucumber this size to become fully grown.

I would've expected another month, but I hope I'm wrong. Right now these cucumbers are only about a few inches, but I'll keep a close eye on the progress.

Based on the growing times of the majority of my plants, I will need them to last until around end of November in order to harvest them. Unfortunately, the first frost is expected to come around November 1st and they all will die.

Dealing With the Cold Weather
In order to prevent the cold weather from killing my plants I headed over to Wal-Mart & Home Depot to pick up some large plastic containers and plastic sheeting. 

I am planning to put the shorter plants in the plastic containers to act as small greenhouses and I will put the taller plants in my "green tent". You can see a picture of the "green tent" in the picture above. It is made of 6-mil clear plastic sheeting and is covering the stone wall (which hopefully can help retain some heat).

Here is an inside view of the "green tent" and the $3 thermometer that I bought. It is warmer in there, but definitely not over 100 degrees. I probably should have purchased the $7 thermometer instead...

The stone should keep a decent amount of heat, but according to Google, water can retain heat longer than most other substances. Based on this, I may have to include very large containers of water in the "green tent" in order to keep as much heat in there as possible (Especially to help my plants last throughout the colder nights).

If this green tent works well enough, I will have a warm place to stay when my parents kick me out of the house.

Preparing for the Spring 
(15' X 7' Area Cleared For Raised Beds)

A couple of weekends ago, my younger cousins came over and helped me clear out a 15' x 7' area in the woods to make room for my 2016 Spring Garden! It was a a tough job removing all of the weeds, rocks, vines, etc., but luckily they did most of the work. They even made me three scarecrows, which I will be saving to use for next year.

Most would likely schedule a fun weekend of activities for their cousins, but not me. I believed it was best to delegate intense manual labor instead.

Cons
- Far distance from house (Difficult to check on & water)
- More vulnerable to attacks from deer, small critters and insects

Pros
- 7+ hours of sunlight each day in the Spring & Summer
- Can make raised garden beds without ruining existing property

Next Steps
I still have to level the entire area with either dirt or leveling sand. Next, I will make two or three raised garden beds. Finally, I will have to make a fence to keep the deer and other wild animals from eating everything.

Although this spot is not the easiest place to get to, I was able to run a few hoses and attach them to a soaker hose. Once I buy an electronic hose timer, I should be all set with an automatic watering system!

Aside from water, sunlight and protection for my crops, the last thing I need is good soil!

Collection of Leaves (Obtaining Black Gold)
This summer I bought a couple bags of garden soil, which cost me about $15. I thought this was pretty reasonable, but next year I am going to need a lot more (and regular cheap topsoil just won't be good enough, as the plants need additional nutrients to grow). I checked out some farming videos on Youtube and the #1 way of obtaining cheap garden soil is to make it yourself!

To do so I will need to make my very own compost (consisting of coffee grounds, tea leaves, banana peels and last, but definitely not least.... leaves!!!)

To prepare for next year, this going to be me over the next few months.

I have had great support from everyone so far, including my family. Quotes from my grandma below:

"You are one sick basta**"
"Nevermind this farming bulls***. When are you moving out!?"

Updates to follow.

Good Burger!!!!!!

The Dog Party (Benny R.'s First Birthday)

Me: "I went to a dog party this past weekend."

Uncle: "What is that? A party with ugly chicks?"
Me: "...I have to write this in my blog."
Uncle: "What's a blog?"

For those who don't know, I just recently went to a dog party. More specifically, a birthday party for my co-worker's dog Bentley/Benny R. For those who don't believe me, kindly view the invitation to the right.

If was definitely a once in a lifetime experience.

Buying the Gift
Before I went to the party, I figured that I should get a present for my colleague's dog. I went to Wal-Mart and picked out a few dog toys and treats. I made sure every gift was blue, including the gift bag. Why? It is common knowledge that blue is Benny R.'s favorite color.

I headed over to checkout, where the cashier immediately asked me why I was buying so many blue items.

Me: "I'm going to my co-worker's dog's birthday party and his favorite color is blue."
Cashier: "A party for a dog?"
Me:"Yeah..."
Cashier: "Um, Okay."

Getting to the Party

I took my dog and drove about fifty miles north to a park where the party was being held.  Being that I have a terrible sense of direction, I can never follow printed directions. Example: last year I printed out directions for a colleague and it lead him to the middle of nowhere. He found his way back, but he was twenty minutes late to a company outing. He's hated me ever since.

Anyway, I was relying 100% on my GPS. After about forty minutes of driving through winding, narrow and hilly roads I lost signal on every radio station. The next ten miles felt like I was driving up a mountain until I finally found the park. I saw a sign and turned in.

Being that I was now driving through a forest, the GPS stopped working and I was on my own... For the next five minutes I just kept on driving straight, but ended up going around in the same circle twice. On my third try, I saw some random old people sitting in the forest and they motioned me towards a narrower path.

I thought it was a walking path, but I just kept on driving straight hoping for the best. Then I saw some guy walking his dog and I asked for directions.

Angry Man: "I don't know. Some people are barbecuing up there." (I thanked him, but I'm still not sure why he was no unnecessarily angry.)

I drove up further and finally made it to the destination which was deep, deep, deep in the woods.

Preparation
I arrived at the picnic area and I was shocked to find that everything was decorated as if it was a child's birthday party! There were balloons, table cloths, party hats and a specially decorated table just for the dogs.

Some people were even wearing black shirts with Bentley written in large white lettering. I originally assumed someone just happened to go to college at Bentley University. However, I was recently informed that these were custom shirts purchased in Wildwood, and made specifically for this party.

I was told that the other dogs would be sitting at the dog table. They would be served grilled chicken and bottled water for lunch. For dessert they would be given a special yogurt cupcake.

I asked some of the other guests if they had ever attended a party like this before. The consensus was that no one else had, but it was Benny R.'s first birthday, and his owners were going all out.

There was a lot of food for the human guests, but even more for the canines. The above pictures include the following:

- Birthday hats and decorations for the dog table
- Personalized water bottles for the dogs
- Personalized goody bag items
- Paw patrol cups for the human guests and/or the dog guests (not sure)

Benny R. Profile
Age: One Year
Birthday: September 14, 2014
Size: Small
Breed: 1/2 Pomeranian 1/2 Shih Tzu Mix
Favorite Color: Blue
Favorite Food: Chicken
Favorite Cereal: Lucky Charms (Just the marshmallows)
Favorite Ice Cream: Vanilla
Favorite TV Show: Paw Patrol
Favorite Season: Winter
Fears: Balloons
Halloween Costume: A Firetruck (Yes, a firetruck.. I confirmed)
Favorite Songs: Uma Thurman, Beamer Benz Bentley and Benny & the Jets
Hobbies: Eating, playing, barking & attacking birthday guests

Festivities
I played fetch with my dog at the lower park, while the birthday dog ran around the upper picnic area wearing an NFL uniform and chasing/biting some of his four-legged friends.

Next, everybody ate lunch (including the dogs) and shortly afterwards it was time for desert. However before eating, Benny R. (wearing a birthday hat) was placed in a booster seat (A seat made for a child or for a dog... not sure) which was attached to the picnic table. Then everyone began to sing HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

After the song, Benny R. blew out his candle and everyone clapped & cheered. I was stunned. Edit: I just found out it was a dog booster seat. He also has a dog car seat and a dog stroller.

Afterwards, the guests indulged in cookies (made for humans) and birthday cake (made for humans).

Personalized Birthday cake.

Dog bone and dog paw cookies.

Each dog was given a cupcake (apparently made for dogs). My dog was hesitant at first as he had never seen anything like this. However, after looking at it for a few seconds and evaluating the situation, he ate the whole thing in one bite.

It was then picture time for the four-legged guests. A picture with the party hats was attempted, but ended up being too difficult to pull off.

End of the Party?
I was about ready to start leaving, but it wasn't over yet! It was announced that Benny R. still had to read his birthday cards and open his gifts. I didn't know this was even possible, but I ended up being wrong again!

There were so many gifts, that even after about twenty minutes, Benny R. was still opening them. It was suggested by many of the guests that just some of the gifts be donated to those less fortunate dogs. It seemed as if the idea was entertained for a few minutes until the remaining gifts were quickly torn open. At that point everyone knew Benny R. was having none of that!!!

Finally, everyone started to clean up and each dog was given a goody bag. This included a dog bowl, treats, a plastic pig, personalized Benny R. M&M bags and some other things I can't remember.

Before I left, Benny R.'s owner tried to force me to take home a cupcake and one of the blue party balloons. Luckily I got out of there quickly before I had to take them.

All in all, my dog had a good time, but as I stated earlier, this was definitely a once in a lifetime experience...

Comments are welcome.

Company Picnic

The Company Picnic: A time for socializing, eating great food and engaging in fun activities. Unfortunately, that only proves true for 99% of the attendees. For the other 1% (Me) the company picnic only allows for one thing... constant torture.

Beginning
Starting the day I was very happy, as I was looking forward to partaking in two things that I love; Ping-pong and BBQ. Unfortunately, the day didn't end up unfolding as predicted.

Immediately I went to the food line, where I got my plate of Hamburgers, Hot Dogs, Chicken Wings, Ribs & a Sandwich (Note: Lettuce & Tomato was on the sandwich). Before I sat down at one of the tables, one of my colleague's nicely brought me a bottle of water.

Me: "Thank you"
Other Colleague: "Wow, it's bad enough that you make everyone else do all your work, but now you make them fetch you drinks!?"

Ignoring his comment, I sat down, and before I could eat even two bites I was being yelled at by the Ping-Pong Tournament Director. Apparently, my team was the first to play and we would have to forfeit if I didn't start the game.

I got up from the table and headed to play my first round match. As I left the table I overheard one of my enemies say: "Don't worry we won't do anything to your food..."

I didn't eat the rest of the day.


Middle
Despite the wind, unbalanced tables and heckling during the Ping-pong matches from onlookers, opposing teams and my teammate, we ended up winning the tournament! Most would be congratulated with a hand shake to show good sportsmanship. Instead, one of my opponents decided to wind up and slap me on the hand.

At the end of the picnic,  my teammate and I were announced as the winners of the tournament. The host (Part-time HR) also mentioned in the announcement that it was unfair since we both play tennis, therefore we shouldn't have been on the same team. People immediately shot me dirty looks and then they started yelling CHEATER at me. It really helped improve my dangerously low self-esteem.



End
When the picnic was over I decided to help bring the Ping-Pong tables back inside. I had no idea why, but there were footprints all over the bottom of the table. Every person who passed by had a comment to share with me.

"Why did you ruin the table with your footprints?"
"Why were you walking on the table?"
"Why were you tap-dancing on the table?"

"Can you move any slower?"

After I finished returning the ping-pong tables I came back to the office to find a bunch of colleagues speaking with the CEO.  I expected them to be talking about how fun the picnic was... Nope. Instead, I found them advising the CEO of how I cheated in the ping-pong tournament. He agreed.

Can't wait till next year!

A Couple of New Quotes Before I Forget

#1. HR keeps on calling me by his new favorite nickname... "Stupervisor". Every time I do something he asks me if I'm "Stupervising". Over the past week I've heard it about five times per day minimum. It is a great morale boost.

#2. A few colleagues were speaking to each other about being in good graces with the bosses for the time being. They then went on to discuss the roller coaster of good and bad times they've had during their time with the company. Although I didn't say a word, somehow their conversation quickly shifted to speaking about my history at the company.

Colleague #1: (Pointing to me) "Has he ever been in bad graces?"
"What am I saying, he can never do anything wrong..."

Colleague #2: "Yeah, are you kidding me? He's like the baby Jesus of the company!!!"

I left the meeting to go back to my desk where I was greeted with "Hello, Stupervisor"


Note: More and more people keep reading this blog each week. I have been warned that comments will be coming soon.

2015 - 16' FFB Draft Rankings

The fantasy football season is finally upon us! Our draft has been completed and the head to head match ups will begin tomorrow.

Last year I decided to take ESPN's projected fantasy rankings to see which team ended up with the best draft (Based on optimal starting lineup). Being that these are just estimates, this will not give a realistic view of who will end up winning the league. However even though these are just projections, it did not stop certain people from becoming extremely angry when they found out that they were at/near the bottom of the list.

Based on the chaos that ensued after I sent out last year's rankings, I decided it would only be right to do it again. Here are the results:

12th Place (Weakest Team): Team Killer Dolphin (Projected Total Season Points: 1,956 pts)

Team Killer Dolphin

Starters	Name	Projected
QB	Ben Roethlisberger	371.3
RB	Jamaal Charles	293.9
RB	Justin Forsett	251.8
WR	DeAndre Hopkins	242.3
WR	Davante Adams	192.4
TE	Austin Seferian-Jenkins	133.4
FLEX	Jarvis Landry	233.5
D/ST	Cardinals D/ST D/ST	117
K	Dan Bailey	120
Total		1955.6

Strength: Top PPR RB1 & Solid RB2
Weakness: Tight End

My Comments: Davante Adams should be projected to score more points, but this is based on current ESPN projections. Unfortunately, there is nothing I can do about it.  However, one thing that I can guarantee is the fact that Team Killer Dolphin will not be happy with this last place ranking. I am definitely now Team Killer Dolphin's enemy (if I wasn't before).


11th Place: Autopick Team Warehouse (Projected Total Season Points: 1,978 pts)

Autopick Team Warehouse
Starters	Name	Projected
QB	Peyton Manning	402
RB	Le'Veon Bell	295.6
RB	Jonathan Stewart	217.3
WR	Vincent Jackson	209.9
WR	Alshon Jeffery	283.4
TE	Larry Donnell	142.3
FLEX	Nelson Agholor	195.8
D/ST	Eagles D/ST	114
K	Matt Bryant	118
Total		1978.3

Strength: Top PPR RB1
Weakness: Tight End

My Comments: Even though this team was Auto-picked for the first five rounds, it is a pretty solid team overall. I had the third overall pick and originally hoped to get Le'Veon Bell, but he was stolen from me. Note: Team Autopick warehouse has bee added to the enemy list.


10th Place: (Projected Total Season Points: 2,002 pts)

Team Flogged Dolphin Starters Name Projected QB Matt Ryan 372.4 RB Marshawn Lynch 262.4 RB Chris Ivory 190.1 WR Calvin Johnson 300.7 WR Julian Edelman 260.8 TE Jordan Cameron 147.1 FLEX Brandon Marshall 234 D/ST Lions D/ST D/ST 118 K Dan Carpenter 116 Total 2001.5

Strength: Very good PPR WR1 & WR2.
Weakness: Tight End

My Comments: The receiving core will do very well season. Both running backs will perform consistently well, but they won't be as valuable in this PPR league.  I wanted Matt Ryan, but he was stolen three picks before me. Note: Team Flogged Dolphin has been added to the enemy list.

9th Place: (Projected Total Season Points: 2,019 pts)

Shrute Farms Starters Name Projected QB Andrew Luck 430.8 RB Carlos Hyde 226.9 RB Giovani Bernard 207.4 WR A.J. Green 295.6 WR Andre Johnson 217.7 TE Jimmy Graham 202.3 FLEX Tevon Coleman 172 D/ST Patriots D/ST D/ST 142 K Steven Hauschka 124 Total 2018.7

Strength: Best QB
Weakness: Running backs

My Comments: Shrute Farms rode Andrew Luck to the playoffs last year and hopes to do it again this year. Team "Luck Me Like You Do" wanted Andrew Luck this year, but Shrute Farms stole him at pick number five. This team has solid receivers, but is lacking in the RB department. Carlos Hyde should be good this year, but there are question marks surrounding Bernard & Coleman.


8th Place: (Projected Total Season Points: 2,026 pts)

Raisin Branflakes Starters Name Projected QB Drew Brees 413.3 RB DeMarco Murray 249 RB Joique Bell 191.5 WR Dez Bryant 312 WR Keenan Allen 235.7 TE Jason Witten 166.5 FLEX Eric Decker 197.8 D/ST Rams D/ST D/ST 140 K Justin Tucker 120 Total   2025.8

Strength: QB & WR1
Weakness: Average Running Backs & Tight End

My Comments: Raisin Branflakes had Dez Bryant last year and decided to take him again this year. He is definitely a top ten receiver this year with the potential of being a top five. Adding Drew Brees to the mix and taking a gamble on Demarco Murray, this team could turn out to be pretty good. With only a year of fantasy football experience, Raisin Branflakes has potential to make the playoffs this year.


7th Place: (Projected Total Season Points: 2,031 pts)

Benny R. Starters Name Projected QB Russell Wilson 372.3 RB Eddie Lacy 303.3 RB Melvin Gordon 204.7 WR T.Y. Hilton 274.1 WR DeSean Jackson 230.6 TE Owen Daniels 138.6 FLEX Doug Baldwin 182.6 D/ST Seahawks D/ST D/ST 203 K Stephen Gostkowski 122 Total 2031.2

Strength: Strong RB1
Weakness: RB2 & Flex

My Comments: I am very happy to share that Team Benny R. put away the Aaron Rodgers love for the draft and ended up taking running back Eddie Lacy with the second overall pick instead (I was shocked). Bravo! With the love of football, the two years of ffbl experience & the extreme dedication to setting their weekly lineup, Team Benny R. is poised for a playoff run. Note: The Seahawks' Defense was stolen from me, so Benny R. goes on my enemy list as well.


6th Place: (Projected Total Season Points: 2,047 pts)

My Team Starters Name Projected QB Tony Romo 368.4 RB Adrian Peterson 293.3 RB Andre Ellington 202.6 WR Randall Cobb 289.7 WR Emmanuel Sanders 250.8 TE Greg Olsen 196.4 FLEX Steve Smith Sr. 186.4 D/ST Texans D/ST D/ST   148 K Brandon McManus 111 Total   2046.6

Strength: Strong RB1 & Strong WR1/WR2, Top 3 TE, Star Kicker
Weakness: None

My Comments: Although the projections put me at sixth place, I have the best team in the league. Every team in the league (including the commissioner) will be colluding to ensure I lose every single week. There have been talks of trading the best players to the team that I will be facing each week. The commissioner has even threatened to drop my players and kick me out of the league. Although the odds are stacked against me I will still go undefeated this year!


5th Place: (Projected Total Season Points: 2,061 pts)

Team Andrew! Starters Name Projected QB Sam Bradford 329.3 RB Jeremy Hill 248.9 RB Arian Foster* 258.6 WR Antonio Brown 357.2 WR Mike Evans 264.7 TE Zach Ertz 143.6 FLEX Sammy Watkins 217.2 D/ST Jets D/ST D/ST 127 K Cody Parkey 114 Total   2060.5

Strength: Best WR1 in league
Weakness: Flex/TE

My Comments: With Antonio Brown & Mike Evans, Team Andrew! has a solid receiving core. As for the RB situation, Jeremy Hill will be strong, but time will tell if the fourth round pick of Arian Foster is worth he risk. Team Andrew! is the reigning fantasy champion from last year looking to repeat the performance in 2015. Note: Let it be known that I lost to them in the finals last year, so Team Andrew! has been added to the enemy list.

4th Place: (Projected Total Season Points: 2,064 pts)

The Spartans Starters Name Projected QB Matthew Stafford 349.5 RB Matt Forte 285.8 RB Lamar Miller 252.5 WR Golden Tate 238.5 WR Amari Cooper 225.6 TE Rob Gronkowski 268.8 FLEX Kendall Wright 192.9 D/ST Dolphins D/ST D/ST 133 K Mason Crosby 117 Total   2063.6

Strength: Best TE in league
Weakness: Average wide receivers

My Comments: The Spartans always seems to build a strong team, but unfortunately each year this team ends up riddled with injuries. Just to name a few: Rodgers/David Wilson/Reggie Bush were all injured in 2013 & who can forget the Adrian Peterson suspension last year. So far, this team looks promising, especially after Gronk's 3 TD showing to open the season. If Amari Cooper can meet or exceed his projections (while playing on the Raiders) The Spartans has potential to go far.

3rd Place: (Projected Total Season Points: 2,075 pts)

Scott's Tots Starters Name Projected QB Aaron Rodgers 411.2 RB Mark Ingram 222.3 RB Alfred Morris 207.7 WR Odell Beckham Jr. 322.6 WR Jeremy Maclin 221.9 TE Martellus Bennett 187.2 FLEX Allen Robinson 228.3 D/ST Bills D/ST D/ST 153 K Matt Prater 121 Total   2075.2

Strength: Second best QB in the league
Weakness: Average RB's

My Comments: Aside from not having any elite running backs, Scott's Tots has a very balanced team with no glaring weakness. All three wide receivers will get an added boost from the PPR bonus with Odell Beckham leading the way. Martellus Bennett also should be a top five tight end this year, especially in this PPR league. Scott's Tots has a very good chance of making the playoffs. Note: There may be some hostility directed at Scott's Tots from Team Benny R. for taking Aaron Rodgers.

2nd Place: (Projected Total Season Points: 2,077 pts)

Luck Me Like You Do Starters Name Projected QB Ryan Tannehill 358.6 RB C.J. Anderson 293.1 RB Frank Gore 231 WR Julio Jones 322.4 WR Brandin Cooks 262.3 TE Delanie Walker 165.5 FLEX C.J. Spiller 214.8 D/ST Broncos D/ST D/ST 113 K Chandler Catanzaro 116 Total   2076.7

Strength: Top 5 PPR RB, WR1 & WR2
Weakness: Flex (Due to injury uncertainty)

My Comments: Although I don't want to give a positives about this team, as the owner is one of my top rivals... Luck Me Like You Do does have a very good team. Strong at running back & receiver, the only real question mark is the flex position (C.J. Spiller/T.J. Yeldon). However, Luck Me Like You Do has a lot of FFBL experience and is always a threat to win the league. Note:  Luck Me Like You Do has been added to the enemy list because Tannehill was stolen from me.

1st Place (Strongest Team): (Projected Total Season Points: 2,083 pts)

The Hebrew Hammers Starters Name Projected QB Tom Brady 391.6 RB LeSean McCoy 268.9 RB Latavius Murray 211.7 WR Demaryius Thomas 323.4 WR Jordan Matthews 239.9 TE Travis Kelce 204 FLEX Isaiah Crowell 204.5 D/ST Ravens D/ST D/ST 125 K Blair Walsh 114 Total 2083

Strength: Strong WR1 & WR2
Weakness: Flex (Uncertainty around Browns backfield)

My Comments: Never having done fantasy football before, The Hebrew Hammers ended up drafting the best team of the 2015-16' season. It remains to be seen how the season will unfold, but with a top receiving core, solid running backs, and Tom Brady leading the way The Hebrew Hammers has a balanced team with potential to make it all the way.


My 2015 Season Enemy List
Team Killer Dolphin (I already know we will be enemies after I ranked his team dead last)
Autopick Team Warehouse (For taking Le'Veon Bell)
Team Flogged Dolphin (For taking Matt Ryan three picks before me)
Team Benny R. (For taking the Seahawks D the pick right before me)
Team Andrew! (For beating me in the finals last year)
Luck Me Like You Do (For promoting league collusion & for taking Tannehill)

Good Luck To All!